We've all been there. You're out with friends, and everyone starts throwing out their favorite bird jokes. You try to play it cool, but pretty soon everyone will notice your lack of contribution. Once that happens, it's basically impossible to fight through the social anxiety to come up with some original aviary humor.

To help save you some embarrassment, here are some bird jokes you can save to use in pretty much any social situation.


1. Can a single parakeet find true love?

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No, but TOUCAN. Right?


2. Who did the bird call when he needed a lawyer?

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Atticus FINCH. (This is a good one to tell at book club.)


3. What is a bird's favorite garden tool?

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A wheel-SPARROW. 


4. What do baby birds call it when their mom has food poisoning? 

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A buffet. (Maybe avoid this one in restaurants.)


5. What do you a call a flamingo walking towards you?

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A flamin-COME. (Only tell this one if you're really desperate, it's pretty bad.)


Now you'll be able to impress all of your friends and family with these comedic gems, without any special equipment! Comedy has never been easier!